..lifE is sO unprediCtabLe..
i was awoken at 2.40+am in the morning.. i had already fallen asleep.. i find my dad standing beside my bed telling me to talk to my uncle on the phone.. all i hear is that "if things get worse call an ambulance.. the number is 995.." i am still in a state of blur from just being awaken.. my dad then informs me that he is having some chest pains.. my uncle calls again and he helps us to get ambulance.. my dad tells me to get changed.. i am still in a blur but i wash my face and change up anyway..

minutes later.. the paramedics arrive.. four of them.. 3 guys and 1 women.. all in my living room.. one carrying a collapsed stretcher.. another with this box like contraption which is used to measure heartbeat.. suddenly realization kicks in.. i stand there watching in silence.. didn't know what to do.. all i could do was stare.. then they brought my dad down to the ambulance.. i was asked to sit up front with the driver.. and sitting in front is no joy ride.. the thought of actually being in an ambulance is scary enough.. and i have to sit upfront alone.. i look behind and see all of them tending to my dad.. he seems calm.. breathing through the oxygen mask or whatever the thing is called.. i recall in my head the things i had heard my dad saying.. about feeling pains in his chest.. that if he walked around he felt worse.. the pain was around his right chest, neck and back.. and that he had never experienced such pain before.. i panic.. i try to be brave.. i retain my composure.. i have to be brave.. my dad needs me.. even though i'm scared.. i still have to coz there is nobody else around.. i have only me..

daddy should be alright right? he was still talking to me before the medics came.. if he could still talk that means he should be alright.. i didn't know what to think.. dozens of thoughts going through my mind.. daddy seems to be quite calm.. so it can't be that serious.. not like those dramas you see on tv where you see the person clutching their chest where the heart was or screaming in pain and agony..

we reach the hospital and at the lobby i am seperated from my dad.. i wait at the waiting lounge.. i feel so alone.. so afraid.. so vulnerable.. i feel like crying.. but no.. i tell myself to relax.. nothing will go wrong.. it is probably some minor thing.. daddy will be able to go home today.. i feel so relieved when i see my aunt and uncle come in after about 10-15mins..

we wait and wait.. it is so cold.. the fans at full blast.. i see several people being wheeled.. all maybe5-10mins apart from one another.. lying on those metal like bed thingys.. i can't seem to recall what they are called and excuse me for my poor description skills.. the first was a guy.. he looked like he might had been foaming at the mouth.. and he was lying with his arms and legs in akward positions.. guess he had fainted.. next was an older man.. maybe in his 40s? there was a bandage over his eyes.. there was blood around the bottom of the bandage.. and there was alittle near his mouth.. not very gory or anything.. but still.. it was scary.. the next was an old women.. she lying out cold.. and i heard my uncle whisper "dead on arrival".. these words felt so eerie.. i was hoping in my heart that the old woman would be fine.. but she looked all pale an weak.. the last was a women maybe in her 20s or early 30s.. i didn't see her face.. i think she had fainted.. her boyfriend was carrying her heels as he walked in..

it's been so long.. i see many other people.. just like me.. waiting to hear the name of their loved one or relative being called out.. wanting to know the situation and how the person would be.. i wonder what is keeping them.. and then i hear it.. "robert soo.. robert soo.." i hear my dad's name.. i inform my uncle and then i go over to the receptionist to ask about my dad.. she says room 8.. so i go over.. and the doctor comes over to talk to me.. in my mind i'm thinking.. my aunt or uncle should be the one here talking to the doctor.. i'm just a 17yr old.. what would i know? my uncle and aunt are doctors.. he should be talking to them.. anyway.. the doc says that as i know.. my dad has a history of heart problems.. high blood cholestrol.. high blood pressure.. etc etc.. and he had some operations in the past.. i believe it is called a bypass.. my dad had suffered from a heart attack.. when i hear this i feel so shocked.. my dad didn't look like he had suffered an attack.. i recall what i knew of heart attacks from tv drama serials.. and he seemed nothing like that.. maybe it was a minor one.. the doc then goes on to say that a patient as long as he has a heart attack.. he is considered critically ill even if he seems normal.. they had already started medication on my dad and they would need to hospitalize him for 5days to a week.. and he would be warded in the ccu.. he then tells me which ward my dad would be admitted to and asks me to go back to the lobby to wait.. i try to stomach all that i have just heard..

i inform my uncle and aunt about what the doc had told me.. we wait again til we see the nurses wheeling my dad past the receptionist counter.. we follow them up to where the wards are and wait again.. after some time.. we go into the ward and look for my dad.. in the ccu section.. each bed had its own room.. there were several such small rooms.. my dad was on a drip.. there were tubes on both his arms and some plastic thingy at his nose.. i felt abit sad upon seeing this.. we talked to my dad.. heard what the doc had to say.. had to sign some papers.. my dad left me some instructions.. then we left around 4+am nearing to 5am..

i'm so glad that my dad's is alright.. i hope he can come home soon.. for the mean time.. i am on my own..

haiz..