..stoned..
feeling kind of stoned now.. must be the after effects of exam stress.. had microecons paper today.. think it's passable.. crapped my way through a few questions.. and the toopid demand & supply curves.. -_-" oh well.. it's over already.. next stop.. cip & statz..

today is yixian's birthday.. "happy birthday girl..!!" =) sorry i couldn't join you guys for lunch.. today's monday which is his day off so it is sort of "pei him day".. we already planned to watch a movie today.. and coz the past few days haven't been very happy for the both of us.. i didn't want to do anything to aggrevate the peace we have managed to maintain for now.. =X hope ya understand..

watched spongebob squarepants today.. quite a lame & funny show.. lots of bum and underwear showing.. =X i liked the part when the princess used her "mermain magic" to turn spongebob & patric to "men".. =X haha.. the baywatch guy part was so stupid..

i want to watch madegascar.. or however you spell it.. the cartoon about the escape zoo animals aka zebra, girraffe, lion, hippo & penguins who get sent off to some island in the middle of nowhere.. hope it's coming out soon.. want to watch the eye 10 too.. he initially promised that he would go watch with me.. and on thursday he said again that he won't mind going with me to watch.. you see.. he's not exactly a fan of horror shows.. and then today when i asked him if we could go watch it next week he said he didn't want to watch it anymore.. he said that he has seen one too many funerals.. like 3 in a row.. u know the kind that's held under hdb blocks.. so he says it's kind of freaky.. i was kind of disappointed when i heard that but what could i do? he says i always get upset over the smallest of things and cause quarrels for nothing.. i admit it is true.. i am tempermental by nature.. so all i could do was just keep quiet.. i know it's not a big thing.. but i can't help feeling disappointed when he already promised.. and i don't really know who else to ask to go watch it with me.. seems like everyone else has already seen it or are already going to see it with someone else.. hopefully when my mum comes back to singapore then we can go watch it.. if not then i dunno.. maybe i'll do the loner thing and go watch it on my own.. how sad can that be?

i'm broke.. well.. not really broke.. i do have some money.. but it's meant for the malaysia trip with my classmates.. my mum gave me the money as a birthday gift.. if not i probably would not be able to go for the trip.. hopefully my pay comes soon.. should be in by tomorrow or the day after.. but it won't be much.. i didn't work much this week.. and i want to buy so many things.. darn.. -_-"

here's a list of cd's i'm planning of getting next month..

1) jesse mccartney - beautiful soul
2) ryan cabrera - take it all away
3) beyonce - dangerously in love
4) jojo - jojo
5) kelly clarkson - breakaway
6) j lo - rebirth
7) simple plan - still not getting any

hopefully money will drop from the sky.. =X *crosses fingers*

earlier i casually asked him what he had planned for my birthday.. i said that he could tell me or if he wanted to keep it as a surprise he could do so too.. then he got into a "sian" and kind of frustrated mood.. he was like.. "you ask me this question.. i really don't know how to plan now".. i was sort of taken aback.. the i proceeded to asking him.. "i'm just asking what you have planned.. like a rough idea.. i'm not asking for a detailed line-up.. why do you have to think so hard?" then he replies "coz your expectations are very high.. and i'm worried i can't meet your expectations.." i saw that going differently in my head.. i was thinking.. when you plan something like a birthday for your loved one.. you would be happy.. even if you haven't really planned yet you could just cheekily reply "i'm not telling you.. coz it's a surprise".. but to get all moody and all that.. that's not a good sign.. i felt abit hurt and yet again a little disappointed.. i thought birthdays were happy things? is it really so difficult to plan a birthday for me? couldn't you have used a happier and friendlier tone? i dunno.. maybe i think too much..

sometimes i ask for too much..
sometimes i just bear it and keep quiet..
sometimes i pretend things are alright when i'm unhappy..
sometimes i show my temper when i can't keep it..
everytime i do things wrong..